Friday, December 6, 2013

Word Problem

Cam sat in algebra for 2 hours. The last hour was twice as excruciating as the first. During the second hour, the teacher began problem solving in paragraph form.

These word problems were 5 times nuttier that expected.

Calculate the time it takes for Cam's medulla to vacate his anus.



F’n Congress!

Hoist your scotch and sing along
you motley ship of fools
For the men atop steered the boat
and now we all must loose

The burg we struck came up slow
and ya know we all had time
But mammon is strong
and sings along
lusting for your mind

So instead o turning left or right
you know they steered us down
'Cause the men atop could've stopped
but they’re all a bunch of clowns

So hoist your scotch and give a shout
to the men we have elected
Who sent us to an icy grave
thinkin' they’re respected


Tube Steak Inspired by a YouTube writing exercise

        brittle like skittles
        fun to gnaw on
        the candy shell encompassing what poets’ long to taste

        soaking up despair
        when worn as clothing enhances a person’s real beauty

        holding it can help you succeed
        holding it with two hands has the opposite effect

Green blades
        sharp enough to cut the wind
        soft enough to sleep on

        give you an orgasm
        strong enough to kill you

A naked light bulb
        shines brighter than a clothed one
        for it isn’t shy

Road kill
        died trying

        a place I have never truly been
        if I ever got there I would probably leave

My Culture

My culture boarders on knowledge and ignorance, generativity vs. stagnation and I am always moving sideways more than forward.

I’m half trash, half refined, and my past is gone. My future is brighter than many, today is OK. I don’t know where I fit in, or what my purpose is except to live. I write more than I watch TV, a lot more, and that has made all the difference

I am lost with direction, and therefore I am not afraid.


Thursday, December 5, 2013


Delicious grey fog swirling inside the canopy of trees at dusk

Making the blackness of the paved trail surreal

Tunneling through at speed, listening to the winding of gears


My love ever closer

Brisk wind fills my lungs and tickles my tongue

Joy fuels my legs

Heart pounding in the wind

Faster and faster I pedal

Knowing her tender embrace awaits



O’ I just wasn’t right
And needed some fiber
So I grabbed me an apple
And sat down beside her

As I bite down
I heard me a rumble
And keeled over
And started to stumble

Before I could make it
To the porcelain commode
Er heard my bowels growl
And felt em explode!

My trousers collected all I suspected
As I convulsed on the floor, with hygiene neglected
Er I lay sobbing
Twitching and drooling, cause my anus was throbbing

As I faded away
Er felt a moment of wit
What I could I say?
But holy shit!



Clear blue eyes and raven lines

Ruby lips and rounded hips

A goofy smile and sultry style

          A mind full of quips

Angst is drawn to her

Pain a pawn for her

          Intense as the summer sky

A mind dark and jaded

Full of blood and beauty faded

          Hers will never die

Passion unknown to me

Thoughts a mystery

          Beauty as sweet as a lie

Awake and alive
in my mind


Fill Er Up

I came to CLC to fill my bucket with knowledge
They took me in to drain me of cash
Now my bucket is half full,
and my wallet is empty

But now I have a piece of paper
I can wad up and use
to keep my bucket from leaking



Long am I crying
Shamed at a glance
Breath it be labored
Tears at my cheek
Face be it wretched
Soul, so so faded
Song of a dying
Less of a man


My Affair with Sci-Fi

At first, I boldly went with everyone else …

    But after America’s last best hope for sci-fi

    I was left fracked in the head, but shiny!

Now I’m getting steam punked over at 13 with Tesla and the gang

    I aimed to misbehave

    So I took the red pill and not the blue

    and now I’m even more fracked in the head

         but now I know, I just KNOW the truth is out there!


Algebra Theorem

Algebra is lot like horse shit; to use it, you have to spread it around.  If you pile too much on at once, all you’re left with is a big pile of shit.


Canoness of Hope

Canoness of Hope
Women of Reason
I am the lessor without you
Halved, alone
From your warmth
Your compassion
Your care
Only with my abbess to guide me

Will the bleeding cease
For there is no man without woman

And no Church
Without Sister